SSDG Same Shit, Different Government - If I Were the Devil


“There’s that biblical story where small David bravely stands against a hulk of man called Goliath. With courage and skill, David slays Goliath. But David fought only one man. And Goliath has been resurrected into a modern hydra beast composed of billionaires, multi-national  corporations and their government servants, all wielding immense power. They’ve proven they’re willing to use that power in the interests of the few rather than the many, knowing that the many, most often, will let the few get away with it. We are the many fools.”Mike Hampton

“Today, I am the Devil, sharing our thieving, bloody South Africa. I do so in the Hope you will see through me. Take back control of your lives. Defeat me. I dare you.”

A July 2014 blog of mine began that way. I’d been pondering the death of Nelson Mandela, the theft of South Africa by the Gang of President Jacob Zuma, and the refusal by Premier Helen Zille and MEC Alan Winde to address DA corruption. That contemplation gained a layer when a derivative of Paul Harvey’s essay, ’If I Were the Devil’, hissed into my mailbox.

Harvey was a national radio commentator in the USA in the Sixties. He postulated what he’d do to corrupt civilisation if he were the Devil. Since then, each generation (and different countries) have expressed their zeitgeist version of Harvey’s essay.

It was perfect timing as the debate in my head had again resulted in there being effectively no difference between the ANC and the DA – one smirking with crime, the other more devious about it. South African bias wasn’t going to change the fact that corruption is proportional to the amount of power wielded. With less power, the ANC would be less corrupt. With more power, the DA would be more corrupt. But they’d still both be corrupt.

Bad thoughts and that email climaxed me into into a gush of words:

“If I were the Devil in South Africa, I would whisper to Helen Zille and Cyril Ramaphosa that they must never listen to the Public… but ironically yell as loudly as they can to the Public, “WE’RE LISTENING,” so that is all the Public hears;

I would convince the Public that right and wrong can only be determined by a few who call themselves Authorities;

I would persuade the Public that character and community service are not considerations when choosing leaders, and that all that matters is ANC gold or DA blue;

I would delude their minds into thinking the power they entrust the self-serving Politician with are blessings from voters traded for a better future;

I would promise the voters austerity and transparency, and then laugh as I did the opposite, knowing they are powerless to seek justice for another 5 years after they stupidly failed to seek justice the previous 5 years;

I would make the ANC rage against capitalism whilst driving fancy cars and feasting in the biggest houses;

I would make the DA rage for liberalism whilst practicing socialism;

I would suck goodness out of society whilst sending the Politicians to church, giggling as I made some of them pastors;

I would convince the Public that big business is there to help them, and that they can help the economy by gambling what they have. And for those who will not give in, I will give them unions that will ask for more, more and more whilst ignoring the poor;

I would tell them that bankers are their friends and then start my own bank to transfer their wealth to Myself;

I would make their pay so small and the price of food so high before convincing them that they can live their dreams now with the loans I give them, enslaving their sperm to Me;

I would make the Police aware they are powerful, and that the powerful can do as they please;

I would make human issues so helpless that humans begin protecting the lives of animals more than the children I made poor;

I would abuse animals, making a million more the activists could never save from the butcher’s floor;

I would make meat so convenient and cheese so creamy that carnivores eat without guilt and vegetarians pretend dairy is unrelated;

I would de-bone the Middle Class because that is every country’s backbone;

I would control the Media, every night polluting the mind of every family member with my agenda until they love Me, or hate me because they want to be me;

I would promote needless toys and hair accessories to the youth, and get their sports heroes and music idols to wear them;

I would ensure teachers are frustrated and schoolbooks missing so that uneducated, non-individualistic children grow into adults like their parents who do what I say;

I would, with all these things, make the lives of parents so miserable that they stop parenting whilst blaming teachers into depression expressed through the greed of unions;

I would promote chauvinism and radical feminism so the majority of people in between would be afraid to express opinion;

I would promote ego so that heteros oppose homos based on my brother’s Bible instead of fact, corrective rape enact;

I would ban euthanasia and marijuana oil so that those in pain can enjoy others in more pain through the eyes of wide-screen TV;

I would take advantage of the dread of AIDS and make the victims ostracised; let the desperate think they can cure themselves with dicks in babies traumatised;

I would dull or scare the minds of good people, making them believe morals are optional, sharing unimportant, and that hiding is not hiding, just keeping to themselves;

I would replace love and trust with the weak and needy dating narcissists;

I would tell all of them that they are not responsible for their choices, that some one else is always to blame;

I would promote willful ignorance so they can pretend they are doing something whilst doing nothing, a society of social media warriors;

I would promote helplessness because they have the power to defeat me;

And then I would start the fun over, giving them elections again and again…

I guess I would leave things exactly the way they are now, perfectly imperfect.”

I made minor alterations to my original for this chapter but that bit about banks and pastors was there before the VBS scandal and the ascension of Mmusi Maimane.

* * * * * *

When the countries of Earth signed an agreement that they wouldn’t stake claims to the moon, they never excluded private interests from possessing that right. It was inconceivable to them that anything but government, the collective wealth of the people, would ever possess the wealth needed to travel so far. But now Jeff Bezos (Blue Origin, Amazon) and Elon Musk (SpaceX, Tesla) are in a realistic race to space. In the next decade, its likely there’ll be space tourism. It’s conceivable that corporates will be mining the moon and landing on Mars. Their adventurous capitalism will further mankind. And the politics of it all will likely be crazily out of mind.

For now, the majority of the rich, especially the corrupt, are more interested in immediate, earthly desires; their pleasure at our expense. We, as a society, are perversely willing for Earth to be our Hell.

What Government data clerk will stand up for what’s right if he’ll lose his salary from which 50% is spent on rent? And it’s all too easy to compromise and compromise until the innocent become the corrupt. The higher in government, the more likely someone will look the other way from wrongdoing or participate therein. It only seems ironic that the one earning the million-rand salary is more likely to be corrupt than the one earning one tenth of that. Humans are addictive by nature. And money and power make addicts quicker than heroin ever will.

There are exceptions to every rule and being rich or wanting to be rich isn’t a crime. There are those who’ve been exceptionally generous… and I’d love to be rich. But, for the most part, it takes regular citizens to be the counterbalance e.g. to be oversight over government and corporates, to defend the rights of the majority. That’s where voting, community service and activism come in.

* * * * * *

Can you think for yourself?

Can you handle me saying that Gandhi was a hypocritical masturbator, that Mother Teresa’s ego made her the empress of the poor, and that President Obama isn’t a gentleman, instead wickedly pro banks, pro public surveillance and pro war?

If you don’t think for yourself, the politicians will take more.

* * * * * *

The war most of us are fighting isn’t the real one. Our bias likely defines our political morality – “We’re right, they’re wrong.” Fingers pointed like an erection gone wrong.

We become citizen soldiers to acronyms such as DA, ANC, ACDP and EFF. We support an ideology we barely understand. We support their funders we don’t know.

Giving up our thought for another’s may be tragic but not so much as when we try justifying it by shouting louder, becoming part of the white noise that devil politics needs to survive. The consequence of our action is the subversion of truth and the consolidation of sheep mentality. If we make it a habit, we make the hate, fear and madness normal. And we become the proverbial lamb sitting at a table with a pack of wolves, voting on what’s for dinner.

This political war is filled with propaganda and skirmishes, a pushing and shoving for attention, wealth and power. Whether it’s the Republicans versus the Democrats in the USA, or the DA versus De Lille here, they’re all eating the same meal which is us. It’s self-service, not Public service. Make that an understanding, not a colloquialism.

Stop saying that they don’t care but then hugging them as if they do.

* * * * * *

The ugliest is when party loyalty is based on the colour of our skin. Race is used to divide and conquer us.

As much to blame is our apathy towards educating ourselves towards substantive opinion. What should count is the heart of a person, and if they follow it with action. Belief without action isn’t belief at all.

Few would disagree when told that there are good and bad black people, good and bad white people. But common sense is somehow forsaken when having an opinion about the state of our towns – tourism, economics, crime, politics etc. Everyone has opinions. Few justify them. It’s mostly a destructive affair between apartheid and reverse apartheid, white versus black, have money versus wanting money, indifference versus jealousy, numbness versus screaming.

I’m not suggesting we suppress opinion. For example, why can’t we speak about the law and racists logically? Why is it ok for me to criticise whites speaking English in a ‘black’ accent to blacks, but less so to be disappointed at black women’s excessive hair extensions and skin-whitening cream?

I’m deeply concerned that freedom of speech is being thrown into jail, and those that are ‘free’ are casting their vote to ensure that it becomes status quo.

Willful ignorance eventually hurts everyone. If we don’t think for ourselves, the politicians will silence us more.

We’re a flock of hate that the politicians are breeding to be killed as short-term vote for their trip to that market called Parliament. It’s the decivilisation of South Africa.

* * * * * *

I wish we were all coloured atheists, less superficial, more thoughtful and less inclined to want to jump on the populist conveyor belt. If we all looked the same, and thought independently, politicians would have to find different ways to make us hate each other.

If we realised that, we could skip generations of sex to think differently now. It’s not just a thought, it’s advice.

Next: ‘Interruption – Gods, Politicians & Pastors’

Or download the full ‘Same Shit, Different Government: Book 1 – The Corruption & Intimidation’ for free:

The truth may be bitter but sharing it is sweet!