Last night i was asked several times, again, why i do what i do. Most people don’t understand how i can work (mostly) seven days a week and handle the stress of attacks and counter-attacks for no financial reward.
I wish i was a more righteous person in that i could give a simple answer but the fact is i’m no monk – i regularly have days where i want to quit, caused not but the baddies i chase but my frustration at the public constantly complaining about issues despite having handed over control of their lives to the very people they are complaining about. It’s not practical, and i’m no fan of hypocrisy, but i understand that the root cause is Fear.
Financially, it has been very rough the past 3 years. I seek no riches – give me a beer, braai and a computer and i’m a happy guy. But, unfortunately, i’m at the point in the red where i have to restructure and get people involved or be forced to quit and go wherever i can get a roof over my head. I’m no quitter so i will try my hardest to accomplish the former. Getting others motivated will be essential.
This is our home. That should be reason enough for us all to stand up… but that logic is difficult for people to accept when they’re predominantly fearful, whether they realise it or not. Yes, we live in a scary world, from growing international chaos to the severe corruption of South Africa and the immense challenges we are facing in the small towns on the Garden Route. It makes people hide when they are most needed to stand up. My own fear is that it’s going to get harder unless we make our lives more manageable and change our way of thinking towards others.
How do we face our fears?
“I don’t know. Death’s a funny thing. I used to think it was a big, sudden thing, like a huge owl that would swoop down out of the night and carry you off. I don’t anymore. I think it’s a slow thing. Like a thief who comes to your house day after day, taking a little thing here and a little thing there, and one day you walk round your house and there’s nothing there to keep you, nothing to make you want to stay. And then you lie down and shut up forever. Lots of little deaths until the last big one. Perhaps Death has already came to my house, but then again maybe life has a same method, by always bringing something new to my house.“
I love that ending. We need to keep bringing little bits of life back into Knysna and back into our lives. Only action can accomplish that but we should start with Hope. Gaiman wrote this lovely debate between Morpheus (who is also known as Dream) and Choronzon, a demon. I found it inspiring and thus hope you do too:
Choronzon: I am a dire wolf, prey-stalking, lethal prowler.
Morpheus: I am a hunter, horse-mounted, wolf-stabbing.
Choronzon: I am a horsefly, horse-stinging, hunter-throwing.
Morpheus: I am a spider, fly-consuming, eight legged.
Choronzon: I am a snake, spider-devouring, poison-toothed.
Morpheus: I am an ox, snake-crushing, heavy-footed.
Choronzon: I am an anthrax, butcher bacterium, warm-life destroying.
Morpheus: I am a world, space-floating, life-nurturing.
Choronzon: I am a nova, all-exploding… planet-cremating.
Morpheus: I am the Universe — all things encompassing, all life embracing.
Choronzon: I am Anti-Life, the Beast of Judgement. I am the dark at the end of everything. The end of universes, gods, worlds… of everything. Sss. And what will you be then, Dreamlord?
Morpheus: I am HOPE.